Wizbits From Dad

Introduction to
Wizbits From Dad™
by Carl Powell III
copyright©2003-2009
www.cp3.com

My parents had a profound effect on me and the way I think. This is no major revelation in itself, but some of the effects are worth sharing. My mother, of course, had a lot to do with how I turned out, and I may write a book about that sometime, but this book focuses on my father. Dad was always vocal about things and many of his sayings really stuck with me. Mother often said these and other things, but (no offense, Mother) this group I’ll share as if they came just from Dad.

Some of the lessons he taught me were obvious, spoken attempts to share a particular piece of information. Others, that were less obvious or non-verbal, sometimes even subliminal, he communicated to me through his actions and attitudes. Lately, I’ve found that in day-to-day conversation with those around me, these “sayings” keep popping up. Often, I catch myself saying: “My Dad used to tell me…” followed by some little bit of wisdom or an anecdote that relates to the current topic. Over the years, as I have begun to witness some of life’s lessons personally, these bits of wisdom or “wizbits” have become even more meaningful to me. When added to my new experiences, they have begun to mold my attitudes and directions in life. The wizbits have become much more than the “one-liners” Dad told me. I think he knew that would happen and intentionally planted these seeds to grow.

This is an attempt to bring those “wizbits” to others. I hope that they will make you smile, help you remember your father with kind regards, and maybe even make you a little wiser.

You only get one chance at a first impression

Recently, my daughter called me about an interview she had to attend. It was not for a job, but was for consideration for an award in school. She is a casual dresser. Always modest, but comfortable in her dress. She’s not a frilly, lacey, show off dresser. So she asked me, “Should I dress up for the interview?”

Well, immediately, I remembered something Dad had told me many times. I don’t know if it was for my first interview, or whether I was meeting someone special, or what, but he told me what I told my daughter: “You only get one chance at a first impression.”

The expression itself is very simple. But you have to realize what it really reveals about the situation. You only meet someone for the first time ONE TIME. After that, there is no way you can go back and change how you looked, how you acted, how you felt (and let that affect the way you acted), or anything you said. It is truly a one-shot deal. You just get that one chance. Then, it’s gone.

Obviously, you should always make the best of any first impression. You see people brushing their hair over, checking their teeth for lipstick smears, looking in the mirror to make sure everything is in place, before meeting a special someone. All good ideas. If you have the opportunity to impress someone, dress for the occasion, stand and sit with excellent posture, use your best manners, answer politely any question that is posed, and above all, remember: You only get one chance…

Whether you rent, or whether you buy, you pay for the space you occupy!

Over the years, Dad has invested in a lot of real estate. Most of which, he wishes he’d kept, but sold right before it took off in value. While I was still living at home, we moved a number of times. We lived in the same house until I was four years old, then moved to Sheffield, Alabama. There, we lived in six different houses before I left for college. Each time we moved, Mother and Dad would try to find something that was more suitable, larger (as the family grew… I have three brothers), better situated, etc. I’m sure he rented at first to find out where we wanted to live, but eventually he would buy a house and keep it for a while, then sell it to move to a larger or better one.

Dad also had a lot of business real estate. He still has some. We had a number of businesses over the years. Each one unique in its needs. Sometimes, he would rent, other times he would buy. But whenever feasible, he would try to buy the property we used in order to grow equity. As I asked him how he decided, and why buy instead of rent, he would tell me: “Whether your rent, or Whether you buy, you PAY for the space you occupy!”

This is still true. Always will be. If you rent from a landlord, you are, in effect, paying his/her payment for them, sometimes a little extra as well. This allows them to finance the property, keep up with repairs, and still show a profit because they also get to deduct the interest on their loan and any costs, plus depreciation. They can actually get a positive cash flow and pay less taxes. It’s good for them.

Sometimes rentals make sense. If you need to find out if you’re in a good location or not, if you’re new to an area, if you’re not sure the business will survive a few years, rental makes great sense. Other times, buying makes more sense.

When you buy, you are building the equity. You make the payment, you get to deduct the interest (for now at least), and one day, perhaps you can sell it and make a lot of money. But you pay the same or a little more for this privilege. Not everyone can do it, but if you can, it makes good sense.

At the time of this writing, there are a number of problems in the real estate market. As a result of the economy, real estate has gone through a crash of sorts and many people have ended up losing their homes in the process. For many years, it has been well established that owning your own home is one of the best ways to save and invest. In fact, for most Americans, that is the only savings they have. It seems that it has always been the best thing you could do for yourself and your family to provide future financial stability. However, in light of recent events, that may no longer be the right decision for all people. For some, during economic downturns, your best bet may well be to rent until things settle and save up for a time when buying makes more sense.

Even in light of the current situation, this wizbit is no less true.

Don’t Straddle The Fence

As kids, Dad would take my brothers and me on lots of hikes. At the time, I thought Dad was a big outdoorsman, and he did like the outdoors and camping and such, but I think now that he took us on hikes because it was fun and it was free. And of course, it tired out the three or four boys he took with him so they could settle down when they returned. I’m sure there were times when Mother must have said in anguish “Would you PLEASE take these wild boys for a hike???”

On many of these hikes, we came across barbed wire fences. After a time, we got pretty good at crossing them. There was always a decision to be made when we approached one, though, as each one was different. First, we had to decide if we could go over, under or through the fence. This depended on how the wires were stretched between the posts, how much room was between them, whether it was a new or old fence, and how strong the fence was (in case we needed to climb over it).

Many times, we would hold part of the fence with our hand, pulling up with all our might, and pushing down on the lower wire with our foot making a nice sized “hole” through which one of our siblings could climb without getting stuck by the barbs. Then, from the other side, brother after brother would hold for the next person in line. Of course, as boys, we would sometimes let go too soon “on accident” and cause spats and screams. It was so much fun! (Another reason Mother didn’t always go with us.)

Of course, the worst was when we tried to climb over the fence and lost our footing and fell onto the barbed wire fence. OUCH! that would hurt! Of course, there was always the threat of having to get a tetnus shot on top of the pain. Double-ouch! At any rate, we soon learned to be VERY Careful around those fences. That’s a lesson you carry with you through life for sure.

Later in my raising, I vaguely remember going to Dad with some decision or another that required me to choose sides or to go one way or the other. Dad reminded me: “Don’t straddle the fence… it will only make your crotch sore!”  Somewhat crude, but how true it is! When you need to decide, the last thing you need to do is try to do both things. You will either get grief from both sides or feel like you’re being torn down the middle. In those situations, you are usually better off to make a decision and move on over to that side. If you see you’ve made the wrong decision, then by all means, go back over the “fence.”  But you have to know that trying to do two things, in opposite directions, is impossible.

Another way of thinking about it is when you are attempting to get on a boat from the dock. You place one foot on the boat and start to move. At that point, you either have to get on the boat or not. If you hesitate, and the boat moves, you’re in the water. Getting on a boat is a decision you commit to. You make your move and keep moving. You can’t be on the dock and on the boat at the same time. Unless the boat is tied securely, and even then, one side moves and the other doesn’t. It’s still not a good position.

Dad’s warning may sound a bit crude and give you thoughts of terrible pain, being dropped onto a barbed wire fence. But that is a good way to remember it. When you straddle the fence, you’re going to make yourself hurt, disappoint others, look like a non-decisive idiot and be the laughing stock of the “brothers” around you who get a good laugh out of your misfortune. Not a pretty picture. Neither is indecision.

At this point, I’m also reminded of Dad’s other Wizbit: ”Do Something, even if it’s wrong!”  and my Wizbit that may be to come: “To not decide, is to decide not to.” Indecision is not a failure to make a decision. It is a decision… to do nothing. It rarely takes you to a successful end.

Make decisions. Choose. Move forward. Be decisive. Be successful. Don’t straddle the fence… it will only make your crotch sore.